Things I Can't Get Over

My So-Called Life 

Why was Claire Danes so awesome? Why was Jared Leto so hot? These are questions I just can’t find the answer to. Red hair, grunge boots, gay friend--why don’t they show re-runs of this shit? It was so overly mature that I couldn’t even understand half the story line, but I was in love. I can’t get over it.

The importance shaving my legs 

Once I stopped shaving my legs for five years. It was in tribute to Phish, who had broken up. I was broken over the whole thing and needed to protest. I chose not to shave my legs, and would you believe that hardly anyone noticed?! I was bummed about that, but I held out.

Five years later, when Phish started touring again, I shaved my legs again (and for the record it took like 45 minutes and two razors!) What I can’t get over, though, is the fact that shaving my legs, whether I do or don’t, just doesn’t seem to matter to anyone. Women are wasting countless amounts of money and energy over this issue--they want smooth legs, but who is noticing? Probably no one.

How good pasta is 

I have tried desperately to get over my endless need for carbohydrates in the form of pasta but I just can’t (obviously by trying to eat myself into a pasta coma). Sometimes I eat a bad pasta dish and it’s STILL good. Frustratingly so. I just want to eat pasta for each and every meal in some form and I feel like ultimately, it’s either going to straight up kill me or make me 400 pounds.

I do extra work outs just so I can eat pasta because I am so positively obsessed with it. Quitting smoking was hard, but quitting pasta will simply never happen.

That Simon and Paula Left Idol 

I was 16 and when you heard that “oh-whoa-whoa” you knew it was Idol time. Kelly Clarkson was a golden god. Why did Paula have to leave? Why did Simon have to follow? Sure, X Factor is “okay” but it’s just no Idol and lightening doesn’t strike twice.

This season, we recorded the auditions of Idol, but the sight of J Lo and Steven Tyler just makes me gag. I can’t fathom watching it... the magic is gone but the memory of all those great years are still in the back of my head. I will also always wonder, why did they leave Randy behind? Was it because of the annoying “dog pound” thing?

Why my husband didn’t buy me that donut maker 

I thought I was clear about how much I wanted it and the fact that I had a whole donut plan. Christmas morning came and went, and yet, no donut maker. I know what you are thinking, “Go buy it for yourself because it’s only, like twenty five dollars”.... what kind of fat ass buys a donut maker for themselves? ‘Nuff said.