Is it just me or do people seem to really be flipping their lids over Valentine's Day this year? I mean, seriously. I have seen more woeful posts of loneliness--or fear of loneliness-- in the past week than ever before. Or maybe it's me. Maybe I am just noticing it in a new way.
Either way, I just wanted to hit you with a dose of honesty and let you all know, single, attached or whatever, STOP LOSING YOUR SHIT. IT'S JUST VALENTINE'S DAY.
Will some people be posting on social media about their awesome Valentine's Day with their husbands, wives, boyfriends, and girlfriends. Yes, they will. But you know, let's take a moment here to pause and put some social media into perspective. Honestly, the crap you see on someone's FaceBook is not really real--it's the highlights reel. Seriously.
If I wasn't me, and I was solely judging on my FaceBook, then I might look at it and think, "Wow. Home girl is seriously an over achiever. She must be a perfectionist....with her pictures of her kid and her recipes. She looks like she has all the time in the world to sit around and cook up fancy recipes!" But the reality of my life is much different than what my FaceBook might look like... sure, I love my life, it's great and it's mine. I have a ton of fun. But I have my problems... I just don't go posting about my disappointments (like when I get yet another rejection letter from a literary agent), or my panic attacks or whatever.
So just remember when you see those lovey Valentine's Day posts (mine will be about tacos, by the way), you never know what the reality is. Sure, that could may be going out on the town, but they might come home and fight about bills. Or not have sex. Or they might truly be the world's best and most happy couple. But who fucking cares. Worry about yourself.
Not having a date on Valentine's Day doesn't mean anything special. It doesn't mean you are somehow undesirable. It just means that you don't have to go out and spend money on a made up holiday. Sure, these little Hallmark holidays can be fun, but there just shouldn't be that big of an attachment to them.
I was listening to a great talk by Tara Brach the other day called "Real But Not True." Things can be real enough, but that doesn't always make them true. It's timely in light of Valentine's Day. Sure, it's real, we can perceive it, but it's just not true. Valentine's Day is no more the truth of love than Thanksgiving is the truth of "sharing" with the Native Americans (don't even get me started on how far off we've gotten there!)
So if you're feeling a little down in the dumps this Valentine's Day, I'm not going to go soft and Taylor Swift and say "Shake it Off." No, I'm gonna go a little Roseanne Barr on your ass and say "get the hell over it." It's one day. By Sunday morning we'll all be back to our no good, unappreciative selves when the day of love is ended.
Either way, I just wanted to hit you with a dose of honesty and let you all know, single, attached or whatever, STOP LOSING YOUR SHIT. IT'S JUST VALENTINE'S DAY.
Will some people be posting on social media about their awesome Valentine's Day with their husbands, wives, boyfriends, and girlfriends. Yes, they will. But you know, let's take a moment here to pause and put some social media into perspective. Honestly, the crap you see on someone's FaceBook is not really real--it's the highlights reel. Seriously.
If I wasn't me, and I was solely judging on my FaceBook, then I might look at it and think, "Wow. Home girl is seriously an over achiever. She must be a perfectionist....with her pictures of her kid and her recipes. She looks like she has all the time in the world to sit around and cook up fancy recipes!" But the reality of my life is much different than what my FaceBook might look like... sure, I love my life, it's great and it's mine. I have a ton of fun. But I have my problems... I just don't go posting about my disappointments (like when I get yet another rejection letter from a literary agent), or my panic attacks or whatever.
So just remember when you see those lovey Valentine's Day posts (mine will be about tacos, by the way), you never know what the reality is. Sure, that could may be going out on the town, but they might come home and fight about bills. Or not have sex. Or they might truly be the world's best and most happy couple. But who fucking cares. Worry about yourself.
Not having a date on Valentine's Day doesn't mean anything special. It doesn't mean you are somehow undesirable. It just means that you don't have to go out and spend money on a made up holiday. Sure, these little Hallmark holidays can be fun, but there just shouldn't be that big of an attachment to them.
I was listening to a great talk by Tara Brach the other day called "Real But Not True." Things can be real enough, but that doesn't always make them true. It's timely in light of Valentine's Day. Sure, it's real, we can perceive it, but it's just not true. Valentine's Day is no more the truth of love than Thanksgiving is the truth of "sharing" with the Native Americans (don't even get me started on how far off we've gotten there!)
So if you're feeling a little down in the dumps this Valentine's Day, I'm not going to go soft and Taylor Swift and say "Shake it Off." No, I'm gonna go a little Roseanne Barr on your ass and say "get the hell over it." It's one day. By Sunday morning we'll all be back to our no good, unappreciative selves when the day of love is ended.
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